A broken heart is where He starts.

The Lord is near the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

            What happens when glass breaks? It either shatters into many pieces or into several larger pieces. Sometimes these items can be easily mended with the proper adhesive.  If it is a treasured item, the owner more than likely will try and put it back together. I have done this with several treasured pieces that have been damaged throughout the years. An individual is able to repair this item on his own and use it to its full potential.

What happens though when your heart is broken? How do you mend a broken heart? Where do you start? How do you put it together again?

            I discovered a journal entry after my divorce from my childhood. One of my desires as a young girl was to marry and to have children. While I did not have the name of my significant other, I did pen that I wanted to marry someday, and that I wanted to have children. As a matter of fact, I wrote down the name of my first-born daughter. My first born was a daughter and I named her just like I had written many years ago. In 1987, my dream of becoming a wife became a reality; I married my high school sweetheart. Being a wife was precious to me; I cherished my relationship with my husband. I loved him dearly. My entire heart was invested into this relationship. Was I the perfect wife? No. I failed. I will be the first to admit. I will write about that later.

            Nothing in this life would have prepared me for the loss of my marriage. After fifteen years of marriage, my marriage came crumbling down. Decisions and choices had been made for me. The process of divorce had made its way into my marriage. The pronouncement of a judge had declared my marriage as dissolved and I was left with a broken inconsolable heart. The deep piercing pain in my heart was intense. At times it felt like I could not breathe. Breathing actually hurt. The normal rhythmic pattern of my heart changed. I could physically feel my heart racing at times or my heart skipping a beat from the pain that surrounded its chambers.

            My days were long, and my nights were dark. I spent them trying to ease the pain for the sake of my daughters, but alone I could not find a solution. Nothing at all would suffice. Day in and day out the grief was real, and it was pitching me into a pit of despair. The pressure and the tightness of my chest sometimes was unbearable. At some point, I made an appointment with a cardiologist to see if maybe he had a solution. The pain was that intense. It was affecting me physically, and I knew it.  How will I ever survive?

            It was in this broken state that I encountered the One who would walk me through this immense heartache. I was familiar with Him, but I really did not know Him. During my pain and in search for an answer, hope beckoned me. Hope? What hope? For the first time in months, I felt a bit of relief from the one who knew my pain. The Great Physician, Jesus Christ, found me in dire need. Little did I know; the process of restoration was on its way. He started a process of restoration that would teach me, mold me, discipline me, restore me, and free me. Christ is that hope; He is the one that beckoned me on that dark, raining, and sunny day. Yes, I experienced all three of these things on that dreary day.

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